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dutchvanity
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Post subject: HELP me.
 Posted: Sep 27, 2010 - 05:42 AM
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Joined: Sep 27, 2010
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This october is going to be my second year with my boyfriend and he wants us to be engaged next year, he already told his mum. We were friends for 8 years before we got together so we basically know each other really well.
The problem is this..
I recently found out that he had sex with a prostitute when he was away with a bunch of guy friends, consists of married men who cheat on their wives.
He cried when he confessed, he said he really regret it and bla bla bla. So this engagement is a really important event and eventually we're going to get married so how do I get over this? I cannot forget about it, do I forgive him or not? Should I even get married to him.......?
I am in a really huge dilemma.
So..... HELP? |
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honeydew
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Post subject: RE: HELP me.
Posted: Sep 30, 2010 - 04:35 PM
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Joined: Sep 30, 2010
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| Were you a couple when he paid for sex? I'm not dismissing it in anyway but it wasn't an affair..he didn't spend weeks or months contacting a woman behind your back, meeting in secret and lying to you. I woudnt rush into anything until you know how you feel. If you can forgive an put it behind you then that's great, if not then you have to way up life without him against life with a man who made a mistake. Good Luck xxx |
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smackie9
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Post subject: RE: HELP me.
Posted: Oct 09, 2010 - 05:55 PM
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Joined: Aug 14, 2004
Posts: 1072
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Hah that's no mistake. That's just being selfish. He looked at it as "what she doesn't know won't hurt her" attitude.
You should ask yourself, when you are pregnant, bitchy with hormones and don't want to be touched for several months.....how will he handle himself then? And as the years go by the interest in sex will taper off and the romance will die off. These are the things that married couples face.
I suggest couples counseling before you are damn sure he's gonna be committed to you.
Me personally, if a guy has to side step a relationship so he ca get his jollies with a whore paid for or not, his ass would be kicked to the curb. Just think...would he forgive you if you fucked some random guy one night out with you friends that were cheating wives? I doubt it. |
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valentine
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Post subject: RE: HELP me.
Posted: Oct 22, 2010 - 04:10 AM
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Joined: Oct 22, 2010
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I think you should consider this: If he is cheating on you now and you're not married, he may be capable of doing this after you're married. Perhaps you should consider waiting to get engaged until you've had time to think if this is really the right man for you.
Although you've known him a long time, one never really knows everything about their significant other. Please think long and hard about it. Think about what you want in a partner, what are the deal breakers?
Marriage is a serious thing!
Good luck!
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jlt07
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Post subject: RE: HELP me.
Posted: Nov 08, 2010 - 03:28 AM
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Joined: Nov 08, 2010
Posts: 6
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You have to treat this how you feel about it, he cheated on you prostiute or not. He cheated on you, he confessed although which means he feels sorry for it.
My suggestion, punish him, not nesseriorly cheat on him I'm talking get distant flip it an make it his problem.. Make him earn you back however you feel that happesns. Cheating is no laughing matter especially when a guy pays for it, even blackout drunk you can still sometimes remember (sometimes haha) unless he was drugged or forced to have sex I feel he is to blame.
It's up to you if you forgive him, follow your heart! |
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