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what_the
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Post subject: MARRIAGE & MY HUBBY WANTS THREESOMES
 Posted: Jan 22, 2009 - 12:23 AM
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Joined: Jan 22, 2009
Posts: 1
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So here is my first entry - however asking for advice I think I know the answer myself, but want other opinions so please if you can let me know your thoughts:
My husband and I have experimented with threesomes (a mate of his, him & me) - I felt horrible, low & discusting and we split up for two years. We have been back together for 5 years now - however, he never lets up about doing it again. I have threatened to leave, i've asked him to go to councelling as I think he has a problem with always wanting it. We have been in the middle of sex and he throws in a mates name which toatally switches me off and I fume at him. Then 3months down the track he does it again...
One of the problems which I believe contributes is he sometimes takes speed, this is when it seems to come up the most and alcohol. I have asked him to quit/no longer do it but in relation to the drugs, sex, etc he tells me he doesn't have a problem...
He offers me by saying "you could go hook up with someone" and I spew at him for saying this - I feel disrespected, unloved and hurt. I tell him this and he stops for a couple of months and tells me how much he loves me...
How can I really convince him THIS ISN'T NORMAL...
Or do I just accept he will never change - I feel so stupid holding out hope cause I still love him, but am slowly coming around to think - enough is enough. |
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vwgirl
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Post subject: RE: MARRIAGE & MY HUBBY WANTS THREESOMES
Posted: Jan 26, 2009 - 08:58 AM
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Joined: Dec 11, 2008
Posts: 3
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| You can only take so much... I understand what it's like especially since I am around drugs and that scene sometimes... Guys don't relize what they have sometimes until it is too late. If you don't like the way he is and he has never acted like he wanted to change then I would do whats good for YOU. In the long run you dont want to give up everything for someone who was never willing to even change for you... Just my opinion |
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smackie9
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Post subject: RE: MARRIAGE & MY HUBBY WANTS THREESOMES
Posted: Jan 26, 2009 - 03:30 PM
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Moderator
Joined: Aug 14, 2004
Posts: 1072
Status: Offline
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| Here's the thing, you both are not on the same page when it comes to sex. He likes an open sex life and there is nothing wrong with that, it's just not your thing. You cannot make him change. Is it fair to make you change to suit his needs? No. It goes both ways. |
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mctlong
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Post subject: RE: MARRIAGE & MY HUBBY WANTS THREESOMES
Posted: Feb 12, 2009 - 11:10 PM
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Newbie
Joined: Jan 05, 2009
Posts: 35
Status: Offline
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| I think you know that answer to this one. You cannot convince him that this is not normal. You cannot change him. And maybe you should start asking yourself if its time to move on. |
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carriestar44
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Post subject: RE: MARRIAGE & MY HUBBY WANTS THREESOMES
Posted: Feb 27, 2009 - 11:41 PM
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Joined: May 06, 2008
Posts: 36
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