| Author |
Message |
xlashxoutx
|
|
Post subject: I can't believe my boyfriend called me fat!
 Posted: Mar 02, 2008 - 12:25 PM
|
|
Joined: Mar 02, 2008
Posts: 2
Location: North York, Ontario
Status: Offline
|
|
Hello everyone, I'm new to this forum. I'm seeking some help surrounding a recent issue in my personal life. Hopefully I've come to the right place. So my problem is this. My boyfriend called me fat last night. He said that he's repulsed by me, yet he can't morally sleep with someone else. He also said that he doesn't want to remain at a healthy weight and end up with a huge girlfriend. He told me that I need to lose weight and he didn't do this in a polite way. My reaction to this was very defensive. So many things raced through my mind such as:
- You're not so great yourself buddy!
- I'm not that fat, I can't believe you said that!
- I can't believe I let you see me naked!
- How selfish and hurtful!
The list continues.
Though I don't disagree that I may need to shed a few pounds, I don't believe myself to be fat. I'm 5'7" and I wear size 12 pants. I didn't need him to bring attention to my weight issue. I'm very aware of how I look, even without the negative input. I'm very hurt by his insensitive remarks. Especially since I've been making an effort to work out, drink diet beverages, I've cut out most of the sugar in my diet and I've been eating smaller portions. I've had problems with starving myself in the past. At this point in my life, I think it would be ridiculous for me to behave in that way. I'd like to deal with this in a more healthy manner. My ego has taken a significant blow due to his unkind words. I'd like to become the confident young lady that I used to be. I've lost a bit of weight already, but I'd like to lose some more weight so I can feel better about myself. I'd like to turn his negative comments into something positive for myself. Does anyone have any good dieting suggestions for someone with a small income? Does anyone have any work out routines that may also apply to someone with a small income? I'm open to all suggestions. Thank you. |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
 |
|
mickie
|
|
|
Post subject: RE: I can
Posted: Mar 02, 2008 - 04:17 PM
|
|
Moderator
Joined: Aug 28, 2007
Posts: 147
Status: Offline
|
|
A small income does not prevent good diet and exercise.
I hope you live in an area that has a walking path or sidewalks for daily walking.
100% whole wheat breads and cereal grains, fruits and vegetables. Control serving sizes and portion control.
Walk, walk, and more walking.
NOW.....as for boyfriend.
I question his "morals", his manners and his attitude towards you.
He needs a BIG attitude adjustment.
He will either grow up or grow away. |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
xlashxoutx
|
|
|
Post subject:
Posted: Mar 03, 2008 - 05:03 AM
|
|
Joined: Mar 02, 2008
Posts: 2
Location: North York, Ontario
Status: Offline
|
|
| Thanks for the healthy tips. I just wish I had the money to leave the boyfriend. I'm sick of him attacking my character. I know I deserve better. My goal for the next few months is to save money and tone up. I think being fit would be wonderful for my self esteem. Then I can leave his less than perfect ass and find someone who will appreciate me. *hopefully there is such a person*. Anyways, I appreciate the encouragement and tips. |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
smackie9
|
|
|
Post subject:
Posted: Mar 04, 2008 - 02:53 AM
|
|
Moderator
Joined: Aug 14, 2004
Posts: 1072
Status: Offline
|
|
| I would ditch his sorry ass if he is so concerned about looks. There is no respect there. Don't let him push you to change. If he can't accept you for who you are and what you look like why stay with someone like that? You should do it for you if that is what YOU want. If my old man of 18 years started in on me about the way I look, I would surely show him the door! |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
LoreNicole
|
|
|
Post subject:
Posted: Mar 10, 2008 - 12:37 AM
|
|
Joined: Mar 09, 2008
Posts: 3
Location: TEXAS!
Status: Offline
|
|
| oh my goodness girl! every girl is waaaay too good for that guy, I can't believe he would ever even say the degrading things he said! kick his booty to the door! |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
tigoldbiddies
|
|
|
Post subject:
Posted: Mar 10, 2008 - 04:33 AM
|
|
Newbie
Joined: Nov 27, 2007
Posts: 50
Status: Offline
|
|
| Got a frying pan........attitude adjustment type of pan........no.....he's too good he'd probably complain and call the cops on you........he doesn't deserve you. He must be god's gift to toads, what an idiot!!!!! |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
WiseGal
|
|
|
Post subject:
Posted: Apr 04, 2008 - 07:54 PM
|
|
Newbie
Joined: Apr 04, 2008
Posts: 34
Status: Offline
|
|
WOW WHAT A JERK
DUMP HIS SORRY ASS!!! |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
rideit
|
|
|
Post subject:
Posted: May 07, 2008 - 08:21 PM
|
|
Joined: May 02, 2008
Posts: 4
Status: Offline
|
|
ok coming from a guy, you don't need that or deserve that at all! Get rid of him ASAP.
And if you want to be mean tell him he has a very small willy!
Best of luck but definetly move on girl! |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
kyla1980
|
|
|
Post subject:
Posted: May 12, 2008 - 05:45 PM
|
|
Joined: Apr 24, 2008
Posts: 20
Status: Offline
|
|
| wow. well take him back to the jerk store you got him from. i know it's hard to just up and leave someone but atleast you know you deserve better! |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
anti
|
|
|
Post subject:
Posted: Sep 02, 2008 - 05:04 PM
|
|
Joined: Sep 02, 2008
Posts: 3
Status: Offline
|
|
Alright Girly! Why don't you start with a healthier diet? replace that red meat with healthy greens instead of fatty carbs and cals.
The one thing you should do is work out. in one way or another!! Why not do a few sit-ups while you watch tv, do that walking on the same spot thing while you cook, or even toss a ball against the wall and catch it. Try to keep active for at least 30 minutes a day, in one way or another.
Just keep an eye out and stay healthy, you don't have to be rich in order to be able to keep a good form.
AS FOR THE "dude"
What a dick! at least you dont look like this
I mean hell, my boyfriend has the habit of pinching my belly fat when ever he gets the chance to cause he thinks my reaction is "cute" x___x yes he thinks its cute that I slap his hand away and shreak out "STOP PINCHING MY FAT!" but even when he does that I still don't feel fat and I know he loves me the way I am. Cause... he's my love, the man that will soon be my husband!! and the man that Loves me! So yeah... all that aside....
I believe, by the description that you gave, that you are indeed not FAT. |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
contreq
|
|
|
Post subject: Re: I can't believe my boyfriend called me fat!
Posted: Nov 07, 2008 - 12:09 PM
|
|
Joined: Nov 07, 2008
Posts: 7
Status: Offline
|
|
xlashxoutx wrote: Hello everyone, I'm new to this forum. I'm seeking some help surrounding a recent issue in my personal life. Hopefully I've come to the right place. So my problem is this. My boyfriend called me fat last night. He said that he's repulsed by me, yet he can't morally sleep with someone else. He also said that he doesn't want to remain at a healthy weight and end up with a huge girlfriend. He told me that I need to lose weight and he didn't do this in a polite way. My reaction to this was very defensive. So many things raced through my mind such as:
- You're not so great yourself buddy!
- I'm not that fat, I can't believe you said that!
- I can't believe I let you see me naked!
- How selfish and hurtful!
The list continues.
Though I don't disagree that I may need to shed a few pounds, I don't believe myself to be fat. I'm 5'7" and I wear size 12 pants. I didn't need him to bring attention to my weight issue. I'm very aware of how I look, even without the negative input. I'm very hurt by his insensitive remarks. Especially since I've been making an effort to work out, drink diet beverages, I've cut out most of the sugar in my diet and I've been eating smaller portions. I've had problems with starving myself in the past. At this point in my life, I think it would be ridiculous for me to behave in that way. I'd like to deal with this in a more healthy manner. My ego has taken a significant blow due to his unkind words. I'd like to become the confident young lady that I used to be. I've lost a bit of weight already, but I'd like to lose some more weight so I can feel better about myself. I'd like to turn his negative comments into something positive for myself. Does anyone have any good dieting suggestions for someone with a small income? Does anyone have any work out routines that may also apply to someone with a small income? I'm open to all suggestions. Thank you.
Well, I want to say, leave that guy which can not understand your emotions, but dont be depress, he may be critic in your life, take him as a challenge, so that you couldn't feel same in future with someone else. Join Aerobics and Yoga classes and be slimmer than you are. You can buy some CDs and can practice in your home. It would be cheapest.
You'll have to show him that You deserve better than him.
All The Best!!  |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
mctlong
|
|
|
Post subject: RE: Re: I can
Posted: Jan 06, 2009 - 02:35 AM
|
|
Newbie
Joined: Jan 05, 2009
Posts: 35
Status: Offline
|
|
This guy has a warped sense of reality if he thinks size 12 is fat. You don't need to loose weight for this guy or for anyone. If you're concerned about your weight, see your doctor, find out what a healthy weight for your height and body type is and go from there. But don't do it for him.
Obvious you see (or saw) something good in this guy because you're dating him, but my impression is that he's an idiot. If he had any common sense, he would know that calling you fat would insult you and endanger your relationship with him.
What concerns me most is that this guy is obsessed with appearances. If he's threatening to break up with you for gaining weight, then he is only seeing you on the outside. He doesn't value who you are. You deserve better than this.
He's a bully. He's using your feelings toward him and your insecurity about your weight to push you around. Its not right. Its time to send this guy back to the pound. |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
CrystalLee
|
|
|
Post subject: RE: Re: I can
Posted: Feb 11, 2009 - 12:01 AM
|
|
Newbie
Joined: Mar 13, 2008
Posts: 77
Status: Offline
|
|
Hey if you want to loose wheight thats good for you however dont do it for any one but yourself. all you need is a healthy diet...so lots of fruit and veggies. If you have a craving for junk food or soft drink i find that replacing that with a fruit smoothy is a good way....if you are close to walking trails then you can go fro a walk. also you can use turbo jam...no need to get the tape that costs like 40 dollars just turn on a cd you like with some dance music and dance awal do some stretches and all that goos stuff.....
As for your bf...he is an ass...if he actually called you fat he isnt worth your time....if he loved you at all he would never say it in a way to hurt you at least he would say it in a concearned way and not like the way you put it across... |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
busymommy84
|
|
|
Post subject:
Posted: May 03, 2010 - 04:59 PM
|
|
Joined: May 03, 2010
Posts: 5
Status: Offline
|
|
I agree with these guys 100% first off he had no right to say that and probably did it to hurt you, a way of control. If you think your fat then you won't go looking to replace the guy. It was also a way to make him feel better about his self.
If he loves you for you the way it should be he shouldn't worry about a few pounds. Dumb the guy and find one that loves and respects you.
As far as weight loss smaller portions, a lot of fruit and veggies, less sugar, starches. Find healthy snacks instead of empty calories. Drink plenty of water. |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
ebrown
|
|
|
Post subject:
Posted: May 14, 2010 - 04:53 AM
|
|
Joined: Dec 06, 2009
Posts: 14
Status: Offline
|
|
| Sounds like your boy friend doesn't know how to articulate words in a soft, absorbable way. There are plenty of ways he could have hinted at it before saying it bluntly. If he's not physically attracted to you and you didn't just have a baby, he has every right to say some thing but, being a ass hole is unnecessary. Then again, if your only staying with him because he has money then your both sickly feeding off each other. He's only with you for sex, your only with him for money. Equally shallow. |
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
